this prowl packs growl

da hora

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

When doves fly

BUTT SCENTS- IT MAKES SENCE

"He thought I bought a new air freshener.  But really, it was the beans.  (Wink)  Thanks butt scents"

So it comes late.  But it comes, and stoned none the less (sorry ma).  So...what?  Do I tell you about my day? 
 I woke up with a cheese hangover.  See, I'm trying to slim down, but as long as cheese exists, I'm screwed.  So last night, Jess and I come home and I devour nearly a brick of marble.  In a drunken fuzz, I gravitate to cheese.  Just the other night I apparently came home, melted a pile of cheese and dipped cold slices of cheese into it.  Who does that?  If there's one man who knows how deep my love affair with cheese runs, it's acclaimed chef at Elixir Bistro, Mr.  Firooz Jafari.  Ask him.
Ya, so there was that.  Then Jess and I watched the old swedish dubbed version of pippy longstocking.  Then I met my lovely aunt and cousin and purchased the most beautiful shoes on the earth.
Then sneaky dees, then home.
Fuck, maybe I should just get a diary.  That shouldn't be floating around the virtual world.  Boring.
Your a sucker for reading this far.  Just go to bed.
Night xxoo

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Monday, April 26, 2010

Butt Scents

My roommates and I have this brilliant idea.  But let me preface that with this.  Saturday's Globe had a story about vaginas and all the ways a woman can spruce theirs up.  Some term like "vag-jazz" was used.  Rhinestones, dyes- all sorts of weird shit.  There's even a product some pervy European created; essentially a pheramone cologne for men.  It's crotch scent really, and it was described so pleasantly by the reporter as something like the smell of a back parisian ally on a muggy day.  Nice.  But perhaps most mention worthy was the vag mint.  Ya, a vag mint.
And this is where the clever Scott, Jess and Mag come in.  Some time ago we created the butt mint.
BUTT SCENTS- IT MAKES SENSE
And doesn't it just?  What I'm getting at here is that surely we should put the butt mint before the vag mint.  'Cause ain't no body bottling up ass scent to spread all over the body. So we better get on it.
We've been working on some dialogue for commercials.  And keep in mind were thinking beyond the flavour of mint.  One more reason butt scents should come before vag mints.
 How about this, courtesy of Jess- "Farting has never been this tasteful."
Think about that.
More to come.


Sunday, April 25, 2010

Laugh

I thought about picking my favourite "textsfromlastnight" and posting them, but I couldn't pick.  Today's are exceptionally hilarious.  But if I had to pick.... if I really had to it would be- you'll like this Jess- "You get to witness red pubes.  I'm almost jealous.  Thats like my dream."
Prime.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Tribute to Jimmy


This is Lori and I.  We've been best friends since we could wipe our own butts.

AM I GETTING OLD?


So I met some friends last night... well I intended to.  They said they were at the Dakota Tavern, which is half the reason I went.  I like it there.  I was there a year ago and it was the way it should be.  Dark, low key, great music and an eclectic crowd.  Even some creepy old men, which I happen to like.  Fuck a bar that doesn't have any washed up old cowboys.
Anyway, last night the Dakota felt like a joke.  Bunch of kids dressed in plaid shirts buttoned all the way up pretending to like the live music as they dry humped.
There was all sorts of eye fucking and drink spilling.
I didn't get to talk to my friend.  He was trying desperately hard to get laid.  Props to him, but he was looking a bit cross eyed.... the only hard thing that chick might have experienced last night was finding a way home.
Am I getting old?  Since when did the Dakota become a country version of the Madison?  When did it all get so, ah, lame?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Happy Birthday Jess



It was this dum dums birthday the other day.  So wish her one.
















Yup, my room is across from hers.



















Looking at her now.























Lucky
Lucky
Me

One Good Day

Today keeps getting better.  I started off by reading an epic craigslist posting- you should read it.
Following that good chuckle, I found out I'm getting a whack of cash back from my tax return.  I can eat!
And then my marshmallow salad loving sister told me she's having her baby in a week.  Felix- we meet in one week.  I can't believe it.  A whole new human for me to love.  Rad.
Now, I'm thinking about going to Value Villllage, use some gift certificates.  Thats always an adventure.  But I think before I do that I'll take a nap on the porch.
OK more.  OK GO tonight.
Yup...keeps gettin better.
To be me, right?

Monday, April 5, 2010

Today today

My roommate Scott and I squirted a super soaker over our balcony for an hour, ate cookies and watched tv from the kitchen counter.  Oh, and we tapped Jess' closet door shut.  It's shaping up to be a good day.
That zit is gone.
Bye!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Thats right

A good friend sent this my way. She knows me well it appears.

Pizza

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3HuqOiiHnU&playnext_from=TL&videos=02dTeQkvqCg&feature=sub